When Another Try Feels Like Too Much

 

Chapter 1: The Phone Call You Keep Putting Off

The phone number is written on the back of a grocery receipt. A man has carried it in his wallet for eleven days because he needs to ask whether the bank will give him more time. Every morning, he tells himself he will call after work. Every evening, he finds one more reason to wait. It is not the conversation that frightens him most. It is the possibility of hearing another no, then having to walk into the living room and tell his family nothing has changed. Sometimes a person does not need another speech about being brave. He needs to know how to take the next step when hope has already cost him so much.

That is one reason the account of the woman who suffered with bleeding for twelve years matters beyond the moment of her healing. My companion video, the woman who touched Jesus’ garment and found healing, explores what happened when she finally reached Jesus. Here I want to sit with a practical question that comes before that moment: how do you move toward help after years of being disappointed? Mark 5:25–26 tells us she had suffered under many physicians, spent all she had, and grown worse. The Bible does not call her foolish for seeking help. It lets us see just how much she had already endured.

For anyone trying to trust God after repeated disappointment, there is a difference between taking one faithful step and demanding that the step guarantee an outcome. This woman heard about Jesus and came into the crowd behind Him. We know what she did; we do not know everything she thought or feared. We should leave room for that silence instead of filling it with claims Scripture never makes. But her action teaches something useful: she did not have to solve twelve years of suffering before she could move toward the One she believed could help her.

When life has worn you down, the next faithful step is often smaller than the problem itself. The man holding the bank's number might begin by making the call and asking exactly what options are available. Someone whose marriage has grown strained might choose a calm conversation rather than trying to settle five years of hurt before bedtime. A person waiting for medical answers might write down the questions they keep forgetting during appointments. These actions do not force a miracle or earn God's favor. They are ways of refusing to let fear make every decision.

I don't believe Jesus asks us to pretend the last disappointment did not hurt. I also don't believe courage always feels inspiring. Sometimes it feels like trembling while you reach for the help in front of you. The woman in Mark's account could not know in advance what would happen when her hand touched His garment. We, reading centuries later, know the outcome. That difference should make us gentle with people whose stories are still unfolding.

Perhaps there is something waiting in your own life that is not asking for a grand declaration of faith. It is asking for an honest prayer and one manageable act: opening the letter, making the appointment, answering the message, or admitting to someone trustworthy that you cannot keep carrying this alone. Before the woman touched Jesus' garment, she first had to move toward Him through the crowd.

Chapter 2: When Getting Help Means Letting Yourself Be Seen

The young father sits in his truck outside the school, staring at a message from his daughter's teacher. She has been struggling in class, and the teacher wants to discuss what is happening at home. He knows things have been difficult since the separation. He has been working longer hours, sleeping less, and trying to convince his daughter that everything will be fine. What frightens him about the meeting is not the teacher's judgment. It is the possibility that he might finally have to admit he cannot manage everything by himself.

There is something deeply uncomfortable about allowing other people to see a struggle we have worked hard to conceal. We may accept that we need help while still hoping to receive it without explaining what brought us there. I wonder whether something similar was happening when the woman approached Jesus from behind. Scripture does not tell us her private reasons for choosing that direction, but it does tell us she touched His garment and was immediately healed. Then Jesus stopped and asked, "Who touched my clothes?" The disciples were puzzled because so many people surrounded Him, yet Jesus continued looking for the person who had touched Him.

Imagine how different that moment might have felt from what the woman expected. She had come seeking healing, and suddenly she was being invited into the open. Mark tells us she approached with fear and trembling, fell before Jesus, and told Him the whole truth. There was no carefully prepared explanation or polished account of her life. She simply came forward with what had happened.

That detail matters because many of us spend enormous energy making our difficulties appear smaller than they really are. We tell our families that work is going well when we are frightened about losing our jobs. We assure friends that we are doing fine when loneliness has become part of our daily routine. We avoid difficult conversations because admitting the truth might change how someone sees us.

But hiding a problem can sometimes make it harder to find the help we need.

The father sitting outside the school might discover that the teacher is not looking for someone to blame. She may simply want to understand his daughter's circumstances so they can work together. He cannot change everything happening in the family, but he can stop trying to solve every problem alone.

Jesus did not humiliate the woman for coming forward. He called her "Daughter" and spoke peace to her. Her honesty was met with compassion rather than rejection.

That does not mean everyone we confide in will respond wisely. Choose trustworthy people, and protect private matters that deserve care. But do not confuse independence with having to suffer in silence. God often provides practical help through conversations, medical professionals, supportive friends, and people willing to share a burden.

Sometimes the courageous thing is not finding another way to manage alone. It is allowing someone to understand what you have been carrying.

Chapter 3: When Faith Does Not Give You the Answer You Expected

The woman remains seated after the church service while everyone else begins gathering their belongings. During the morning, she heard someone share a beautiful testimony about receiving an unexpected healing. She was genuinely happy for them, but something inside her felt discouraged. She has prayed about her own illness for years. She has followed her doctor's instructions, changed her routines, and asked God for relief more times than she can remember. Yet tomorrow morning, she expects to wake up with the same symptoms.

This is where we need to handle the woman in Mark 5 with care. Jesus healed her immediately, and that miracle deserves to be celebrated. But we should never turn her experience into a formula that suggests everyone will receive the same physical outcome if they believe strongly enough. Faith is not a way to force God's hand, and continued suffering does not prove that someone has disappointed Him.

Think about what Jesus actually said after she came forward. "Daughter, thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace, and be whole of thy plague." He acknowledged her faith and sent her away with peace. He did not treat her as an inconvenience or make her explain why she deserved compassion.

There is a lesson here that reaches beyond physical healing. We can approach Jesus without having to establish our worthiness first. We can pray honestly while continuing medical treatment, seeking wise counsel, and making practical decisions about our circumstances. When the answer we want does not come, we can still trust that our lives matter to Him.

Maybe you have been waiting for something that has not changed. Perhaps the relationship remains difficult, the medical results remain uncertain, or your prayers seem to meet silence. I would never tell you that those struggles are easy or that believing in Jesus removes the sadness they bring.

But I would encourage you not to mistake an unresolved circumstance for evidence that God has stopped caring.

The woman reached through a crowd because she believed Jesus could help her. What she discovered was not only His power to heal but His willingness to recognize her personally.

And perhaps that is something worth remembering when you face tomorrow's responsibilities. You may still have appointments to attend, problems to work through, and decisions you would rather avoid. Yet you can face those things knowing that Jesus never taught people they had to become whole before they were worthy of His compassion.

Your friend,
Douglas Vandergraph

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